PASSED!!!!!

I finally stinkin passed a test this semester! This semester has truly been an ego blower...but I feel damn good cuz I got an 82%! WOOOOOOTTTTT!!! Anyway..super happy...now time to study for the final. See ya laters :P

Oooooohhh, I miss these guys! This was the last time I went out. I decided to post this pic because ...well...I am excited that I am finally gonna get to LIIIIIVVVEEE agaiiiin! It's amazing to me that it has been so damn long since I have been able to do anything. I feel bad for my friends..they have probably thought I fell off the face of the earth! LOL! Anyway..I am soo ezcited! Life beckons...

Point of no return??

I have test number 4 tom!!! OMGosh! Time has flown by so fast...its amazing! Exactly one week from monday is my final and I will find out later that day if I passed nursing 4. *biting nails* Naw...actually..its weird..still totally calm. So, I am at another study group today..get home and log on my computer...and this is what I find...

Michelle, you need to know that I'm thinking of you and the test tomorrow. I got faith that you'll do good. You know your shit, you just need to put some confidence in yourself and what you already know. Don't read into the question and relax. I'll be wishing you the best of luck and sacrificing a animal to the gods tonight to ensure your success........seriously, just have faith in yourself and you'll do good. See ya around,most love able asshole you'll every know,.......(name not needed)

This came from a guy I have been going tp clinical and nursing school with all through LVN and RN school. He is a very misunderstood and very good guy..so funny. Anyway..it made me feel good that he thought about me..helped give me a little more courage. I also had this wonderful Greek lady named Mary Ellen pray for me before I left her house yesterday. I usually go there with my gramma every year and we wrap presents for the needy. Its so much fun...an theres tons of food! Mmmmm!

So when I was walking out the door..she grabbed my arm and brought me into a hug. Now mind you..this little lady is like 5'3 and 80 lbs... brings me into a hug and takes her cross..does this x mark on my shoulder several times and then says a prayer. She ios such a great lady! Anyway..It just makes me so happy..that no matter the outcome..people have been so supportive and understanding.

My Aunt said.."screw what everyone else thinks or is stressing on you...like your mother..just do your best..you dont answer to anyone else but yourself..so screw 'em all! We are very proud of you and what you have already accomplished." LOL! Awesome right?!?!

Alrighty..Im outta here..need to get a little more studying in :)
Hasta!

Hellooo...been a while :)

So, I have been completely overwhelmed by my last semester of RN school. It has never been an easy subject before, but now its like I have test block or something..totally sucks. What had me really perturbed was the fact that I studied my ass off, knew the info..and yet when the test got placed in front of me..I basically knew nothing. So I decided to study more...hoping that would help. On the next test...I did worse; How in the HECK does that happen...is what world does that make any sense what-so-ever??? So then I freaked! I have never had a panic attack or anything close..Ive always been a "whatever happens...happens" kinda gal...but now...full blown spaz! The day before the test all the stuff I had been studying from 9am to midnight for over 2 weeks straight..was falling out of my head..Luckily, I had my beautiful friends calm me down a little..we studied some more..my fabulous boyfriend called me to talk to me. I was still scared when I went to bed..but then I had a dream.

In my dream I was basically told..without words..that everything was as it was supposed to be..my grades..all that..was for a reason..but I was going to be ok. I was going to pass and I was going to be a great nurse. The overwhelming calm settled on me, and I went into the test with confidence. I told my friends what I had dreamed..I said that ultimately no one knows until the end of the road what is truly gonna happen..but the calm had a hold of me...and I was gonna ride it till the end on the road..it could only help me.

So, I just barely passed the test, but at least I passed it. lol!

I only have 3 weeks left till graduation. whew! thats close! I hope I will be walking, its a scary thought to me that I wont be out and subject to start my life again for another semester!

On another subject. I have now been seeing a really great guy for a few months. We had been friends before had..an yes..as absolutely corney as it is..met on a video game :P The thing that attracted me to him was that no matter what my mood or situation, he is always there for me. I have never before had a guy say to me not to worry, that we will talk about it...and when I am completely irrational (like on my period) and I say I am sorry for acting all crazy or upset ..he says not to be sorry, If I am feeling that way, he wants to know it, that its not irrational, its the way I feel...its something we need to talk about. How in the hell did I get so lucky?? Someone who actually accepts me as I am? Hmm...tho my cynical mind..the one that has been stepped on is always going..tho it has been mostly squelshed as time has passed.

The only thing thats wrong with him? He has depended on others practically his whole life to basically take care of the details of his life rather than taking it into his own hands. He has been floating thru his life..instead of living it. I completely identify with that..its how I was until I turned 26. I always wanted more out of life..just had no idea how to go about it. We have spent hours talking about the kind of life he wants to live, the one he's dreamed about forever but always seemed unattainable. He is now between two choices..the service like his dad or going to college to figure out what he wants to do. He has been wanting to go to school for years...change can be scary..especially for someone who has been floating most of their life.

I have told him, that as much as I care for him, I need someone in my life that will be a partner..my partner in crime..not another kid. So, my current position...enjoy whats going on right now..the way I feel..we feel. There is no rush..no dire circumstance in which we have to hurry. I am just enjoying...and watching. I am watching what decisions he is going to make to change his life. We will always be friends..that is a definate..but I am in no hurry. I always rushed when I was younger..eager to make something out of what was clearly not there. This time there is no need. I am happy on my own. I actually prefer to be alone...no chance to get hurt..no disputes as far as anything with Joey goes..no headaches. But, I truly believe..that..pending the choices with what he is gonna do..this has a chance of being it.

Luckily..we both have time to see. I have to finish school..start working and saving..helping out my family so they are okay..the start saving and figuring out if I am going to move back to Fresno. He has to start school or get into basic and work. We will go from there. Its nice that we work on things together.

On another note..I AM COMPLETELY IN LOOOOOVVVEEEE WITH TWILIGHT!!!!!

My brother bought me the first book for an early graduation present..lol..of course I couldnt wait till school was over to start! He got it for me and I finished in 2 days...woulda been sooner..but sleep got in the way unfortunately. Dont you ever just fall so in love with the characters of a story that they become practically ur friends???..lol..I know..I'm crazay! But seriously..the things they go thru..you go thru it with them..I am sooo luvin Edward! I am always amazed at the way an author can make you feel about the two people in love. Incorporating so much truth in along with so much more that you know what they are feeling is this overwhelming and wonderful thing...making you wish you could have the same thing..lol..even if it meant getting chased by vampires! LOL!

Anyway! Totally ready to read the others! Christmas! Hooray!!!!

So I think thats a long enought blog for today..hahaha! I'll try not to let it be so long till the next one..

<3 Me

My Turn!!

Game guidelines: Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post the player then tags 4 people and posts their names with links to their blog, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment letting them know that they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answers.


Question #1What was I doing 10 years ago?
i was breaking up with Jay, living in the pit of hell that is Lake Isabella and having a whirlwind romance with my "baby daddy"

Question #2 5 things on my to do list for today:
sleep...have to work tonite, get a pedicure with my girl jennette, help joey with his homework, get the dog's insulin, and sleep again


Question #3Snacks I enjoy:
spicy nacho doritos with sour cream, chocolate....oooohhh... and redvines! Yum!


Question #4Things I would do if I were a millionare:
help set up my parents for retirement, buy a house for joey and me, and college fund for Joey

Question #5Places I have lived
west covina
ventura
saticoy
bakersfield
coalinga
fresno
balch camp
auberry
wishon
prather
clovis
sanger
lake isabella
corona


Okay...so, i totally have no one to ask to post this...lol

7 random things about me....

I've been tagged...lol....and even tho your the only one who is gonna read this Lisa, I'm still doin it!

1. I love to be lost (when I dont have a deadline/place to be); I look at is as an adventure.

2. I am going to Henderson, NV this weekend (which is the weekend before my final, yikes)

3. I hate wearing all white to the hospital for school...it hurts my eyes when the sun shines on us..lol

4. I hate putting the laundry away after washing it. They will stay in the hamper folded until used up; most of the time.

5. I actually still really love my ex. I would never EVER be with him again....but there are times when I go back, in my mind, to the way things were and miss him dearly. Damn you Nick.

6.I LOOOOOOVVVVE to sing.

7. I am still waiting for my REAL love to come along.



I dont have anyone else to tag...lol...so I ask any others that my come across this blog to do the same.

On a side not I just finished my dosage calc. test...passed! WOOK! (that was intentional)
I also got thru my clinical competencies wonderfully! YAY!!!!!

So until next time...over and out

Procrastination....

Uuuuugggg. I do not want to listen to my class lectures! I have been sitting in front of this computer thinking of all the other things I could and probably Will do right now. So, I've started the laundry and thought I would grumble to yall...lol. I am sooo sick of listening to teachers and taking tests..I just want to be done already! The problem with my situation and the lectures is that I dont technically have to listen to them...they are videostreamed to my computer, so I can watch them whenever I want...which of course means that IF I watch them I wait till the last minute. Ive just been so tired lately. Oh well...I'm done with that topic.

In other news...my family decided to go on a cruise to the Caribbean. The WHOLE family! LOL...I really really want to go but I think it will be too much. I would have to save about 4 grand for me and my kid to go and I only have 8 months to save for it. Sooooooo....I dont think were going. Sucks. Oh well. I am trying to figure out a cheaper "vacation" fo us to do for now. Since I still want to do that cruise I will save for it, but it will be for much later down the road.

So I guess I sould totally attempt to watch my lectures. Yuck!
So what are you all doin today? I would love to live vicariously for a moment......